The Devil wears….leggings

I don’t, nor have ever proclaimed to be a style advisor to women or ‘queer eye for the straight guy’ but I have got to get one thing really clear so that we can spread the word and eliminate a large amount of humiliation and low self esteem in the world..

‘Leggings are not clothes!’

There you have it ladies. When you don a pair of leggings, essentially you are leaving the house with your knickers on (only they are knickers that happen to have 2 legs attached).

If you are going to wear these awful lycra- based ‘skin huggers’ because they are ‘so comfortable’ , then please spare us the accompanying mid-drift top and wear something loose that reaches your knees. (Especially if you have the physique of a fruit machine and the arse the size of Belgium).

I wonder whether you ever notice that at the top of your legs there is a part of your anatomy that is not conducive with skin-tight fabric , with it’s many folds and flaps, leggings make it look like you are smuggling oreos. Equally the stretched thread-bare fabric ‘covering’ your posterior points out every dimple and imperfection, often making it look like a scene from Buzz Aldrin’s cine camera of the Moon landings.

‘But they are so cheap’ , I hear you say.  Well yes they are, thats because they are shit, you wouldn’t see me walking up the shops in my thermal long -johns- I’d probably be arrested.

Nobody wants to see your clam when they are fetching the daily newspaper, no matter how agile and inviting it may be, so please stop this appalling practice now. Throw the leggings away and buy some clothes.

Spread the word…..

18 thoughts on “The Devil wears….leggings

  1. marycigarettes December 17, 2016 / 10:39 am

    hahahahahahahahaa…. working class girls have got nothing on the gays walking down a big city street in the middle of summer wearing jockstraps…fantastic fun.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. itsmyhusbandandme December 17, 2016 / 11:34 am

    But Man Leggings, now that’s a who other ball game. Just saying.
    JP

    Like

  3. Elizabeth December 18, 2016 / 8:02 am

    I have a friend who wears yoga pants every single day. It’s appalling but I can’t say anything because she has skin as thin as those damned pants. We’re close but I don’t every want to be that visually close to anyone but my husband. There should be a law…

    Liked by 1 person

    • gaystepdadblog December 18, 2016 / 10:01 am

      I know right? nobody deserves to be subjected to the vertical smile that greets you in a pair of leggings!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Elizabeth December 18, 2016 / 8:04 pm

        I’d wear leggings but it would look as though someone stuffed a basketball into a too small polyester sack. I can’t do that to my fellow man.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Patty January 27, 2017 / 1:48 am

    I’ve resisted them. I have one outfit that goes with a sweater dress and that’s about it. In my area everyone is into them and it’s silly.

    Like

  5. Ritu March 16, 2017 / 4:34 pm

    Lol!!! I am a legging wearer… bug definitely of the with a long top ilk!!!

    Like

      • Ritu March 16, 2017 / 6:32 pm

        Lol!! Couldn’t wear them without!!!

        Like

  6. Lutheranliar March 16, 2017 / 8:42 pm

    OMG. You nailed it!!! At least Donald Trump doesn’t wear leggings. Or does he???

    Liked by 1 person

  7. bexoxo September 8, 2017 / 1:43 pm

    I wholeheartedly agree that leggings are not pants! When I wear them, I have to have a top that at the very least, covers my tush. I get that leggings come in all kinds of material, some thicker than others, but it just not a classy look on anyone, including a skinny mini. BTW, you’d probably like my post Fashion Crimes. https://bexoxoblog.wordpress.com/2017/02/20/fashion-crimes/

    Glad I found your blog. 🙂

    Like

  8. thatblogwherecheriemovestogermany July 14, 2018 / 11:50 am

    This needed to be said, thank you.Do these people not own mirrors? Are they blind? Do they not see all the things we see when they have them on? ugh.

    Like

  9. Losing the Plot July 14, 2018 / 1:21 pm

    Things that don’t lie*
    1. Drunk people
    2. Children
    3. Leggings

    *2 of these are wrong

    Like

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